Come to Terms
by j-sensei-rocks
Summary: when Goku calls out, will Sanzo answer? How will he react when Goku reaches out? Will he smack his hand away? Or will he accept it as his own? gokusanzo. i added an OC but she helps, not hurts the plot. Please r
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Saiyuki. If I did, I would be so rich and so famous. Too bad. I have these great ideas when I'm either showering or sleeping. Is that weird? But whatever. I'll put this story up, and then if you like it, I'll see about writing my other ideas. ENJOY. Please review!!! (if you're wondering why there's 2 spaces after the periods, its cuz my retarded BCL teacher makes us type that way)

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It was one of those days. One of those summer days that were so hot, your bones seemed to be melting. Goku stared up at the unforgiving sun. It had been three months since the Great Sanzo Party had defeated Gyumaoh and set the world right. Hakkai and Gojyo had separated from Sanzo and Goku, leaving the two no choice but to walk. Goku had no idea where to, back to the temple he was first brought to was the best guess. He sighed. The shade from the trees along the road offered little relief. He searched the scene for anything to do. Sanzo was a stick in the mud-never talking. When spoken to, his replies were shrugs or mumbles.

"So hot." He couldn't recall it ever being this hot before. Not even in the desert. He let out a loud cough. He marveled at this. He never got sick. Ever.

"Must be th' dust." From out of nowhere, a hand suddenly came flying out of nowhere and smacked his forehead.

"OW! Sanzo what th' hell was that for?!:

"You're sick."

"No I'm not. I'm as fit as a horse!!"

"You've been stumbling around all day and now you have a fever."

"No way. I never get sick."

"Relax monkey, it's probably from the heat."

"What should I do?"

"Stay the hell away from me. I can't afford to get sick." Goku mumbled something under his breath. _I don't get sick. I'm fine. I…_He stumbled forward and hit the ground with an "ooph"

"I don't feel right Sanzo."

"I told you. It's probably just a heat fever. Get up. There's a town coming up. We'll stop at the doctor there." Goku scrambled to his feet.

The next couple hours were brutal. Three times Goku stumbled. His fever worsened.

"There's the town. Come on."

"I can't…go…any further. I-I…" Goku fell to his knees.

When he woke up, he was in a white room, in a nice bed, in pain, with an IV sticking out of his arm.

"Welcome to earth!!" he turned. A pleasant looking girl stood there.

"Who 're you?"

"Where are my manners? My name's Ritsuki. I'm the doctor. You're in the hospital."

"Why do I feel all loopy?"

"You're on morphine. You've caught yourself a nasty case of Heat Fever."

"Is that a real illness? I thought he was making it up."

"You mean the blonde monk that carried you in? Yeah, he's smoking I believe."

"Well thanks but I-" as he tried to stand up, his legs turned to jelly. He quickly retreated back to bed.

"Perhaps I should expain Heat Fever. It's a sickness caused by over exposure to heat and to a certain virus. Symptoms include dizziness, fever, coughing, weakness and vomiting."

"What's th' morphine for?"

"Calm your fever and prevent pain. Heat fever also makes your nerves extra sensitive."

"Oh."

"I'm gonna give you something to sleep, okay?"

"Okay." Ritsuki gave him some medicine and walked out into the halls.

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I am NOT A DOCTOR. I made "heat fever" up. I do not even know if that is a real disease or if morphine is supposed to be used like that. You'll get more of the point to the story in the next chapter. Please review!!!


	2. Chapter 2

Ookay. I'm back. Thank you all for the reviews!!! Well, 2 of you. Enjoy and review.

Ritsuki saw Sanzo standing there. He was smoking.

"He's fine, in case you're wondering."

"I'm not."

"Not worried at all? You seemed concerned when you carried him in here." Sanzo let out a long drag.

"You're pretty young to be a doctor."

"I started studying medicine when I was ten."

"Ten?"

"It's a small town. We're the only clinic in this area. Can't start too young."

"You the only doctor?"

"Doctor, yes. We have three nurses that handle small cases."

"This isn't small?"

"No. Heat Fever is extremely rare and deadly."

"Deadly? Not for Goku. He never gets sick."

"Until now."

"Whatever. When will he be ready to go?"

"Why such the hurry?"

"We've got to get somewhere."

"I see. Well, not for a couple of days. He could worsen any time. Why don't you go see him? He's sleeping."

"What for?"

"Suit yourself. I'll be back tonight with more morphine. If he wakes before I get back, come see me. He'll be in a lot of pain." Sanzo finished his cigarette as Ritsuki walked off. He began walking the halls but paused at Goku's door. It was slightly opened so he pushed it gently and peeked inside. Goku was sound asleep. He walked inside and sat in a chair near the bed. The serene nature of the room caused him to nod off.

When Goku woke, he was first startled to find Sanzo asleep in a chair next to him. Second, he was immediately hit with a surge of pain. He let out a painful shriek. This woke up Sanzo.

"What the hell?" he snapped out of his bad mood when he saw Goku writhing in pain.

"Ow."

Now before you jump on me with "this don't make sense" remember. They drive around in a dragon that turns into a jeep. And in towns that have no electricity, suddenly they have credit card scanners to scan Sanzo's credit card. From the 3 aspects. Make sense of that, then you can criticize me. anyway, plz review!


	3. Chapter 3

I am so back. Well I never have anything other to do than write this is my BORING study hall so I write and write. Thank you for the reviews, you make my heart leap with joy!! I try VERY hard to keep them in character, so be grateful!!! Much love.

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Goku paused for a moment.

"Mother-!! Ass muncher!!" Sanzo blinked. He stared at Goku as line of swearwords dripped from his mouth. He turned to Sanzo. "I'm in pain here. Out of my mind in pain."

"So? Doc said she'd be back soon."

"Soon isn't fast enough! I…ooh. There's a monkey on your shoulder. And butterflies in the soup." Sanzo gave Goku a blank stare. His guess was the pain was making Goku hallucinate. "Ya know Sanzo, you have pretty eyes. Pretty, pretty eyes." Sanzo raised an eyebrow. "An' ya have pretty hair." Sanzo noticed Goku's eyes were glazed over. He sighed. Goku looked at Sanzo. Maybe it was the pain talking but he felt compelled to tell Sanzo his true feelings.

Sanzo saw the look Goku was giving him. The look of adoration. _It couldn't be._ He thought. "I have a secret for ya Sanzo." _Oh shit. Don't say it._ "Wanna here?"

"No."

"The secret is…"_ Stop. I can't deal with this. _

"I…" he squeezed his eyes shut. _No._

"L-"

"Don't say it." Goku jumped. "Don't say it Goku."

"Why not?"

"It's not important."

"Excuse me? My thoughts aren't important?"

"Not to me. I don't give a damn what you think."

"But…"

"Shut up already! Isn't it enough that you bug the hell outta me everyday?! You drive me insane! I can't even stand to look at you! I hate you!" Goku was sure he could feel heart break as Sanzo left. If he listened closely, he could hear the shattering sound of his heart. Tears fell like broken glass. He curled his knees to his chest. _How could I have been so dumb? Of course Sanzo doesn't care. Wasn't it obvious?_

Ritsuki stood at the door with one hand covering her mouth. She had heard the whole thing as well as seen Sanzo march out. She felt a tear slide down her cheek. No one should hear those words. She walked in.

"I have your morphine Goku."

"I don't need it. Let me be in pain. I deserve it."

"You do not!" he glared at her.

"So you heard?" she nodded. "So now what? You think I'm a fool? Go ahead and mock me."

"I'm not mocking you. Listen Goku." She took his hand. "Don't blame yourself." He started to cry softly.

"Why can't he see I love him?!"

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oh yeah. You have NO IDEA what it was like writing that. Do you know how bad I wanted Sanzo to throw his arms around Goku? No sir ee bob. Well r&r. I have another chapter written but I wanna know what you think before I publish it. Tell me your feedback on Ritsuki. She's a stand in, but I do have plans for her if you ever want her story. Tell me so. Until next time, love all you fans!!!

.p.s. my computer hates me for all the mistakes I've made.


	4. Chapter 4

Oh yeah I'm back. Woot for me!!! I love all of you who reviewed so much. Yay!!!

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Sanzo plowed through the thicket behind the clinic. He ground the cigarette between his teeth.

"Hey!" he turned. Ritsuki stood several yards away.

"What the hell do you want? Let me guess, you want me to go back and apologize."

"No. I want you to tell me why you did it."

"Why do you care?"

"Safety of my patient."

"Bullshit."

"You lied to him for a reason."

"I did not lie."

"Now that's bullshit." She stared him down. He glared back.

"Don't tell me what I feel. That little runt causes me nothing but trouble."

"Then why do you keep him around?"

"Orders."

"Just kill him."

"What?"

"Kill him. Make it look like an accident." Sanzo spit the chewed up cigarette out. "Can't do it can you?"

"What the fuck do you know?"

"I know you didn't mean it. There's something holding you back. Bad memories?"

"Where do you get this shit?"

"Experience. You just don't want to end up losing him." Sanzo flinched. "Was I right?"

"I don't tell strangers my personal business."

"Fine. Just ask yourself; how would you feel if you lost him now? Before he knew how you felt? Wouldn't that just eat you up inside?" She turned and left him to think. _I absolutely hate women. Can't let her get in my head. _But no matter how hard he tried, her words still rang clear. He kicked at a pile of stones. _No, I couldn't possibly have any feelings for Goku. Feelings only get in the way. But…if he did die now then…_he stopped. _Enough, this is bullshit. _But no matter how many times he told himself he didn't care for Goku, something always called him a liar.

Ritsuki returned to Goku's room.

"Want your morphine now?"

"What's th' point? Can't fix a broken heart can it?"

"No, I'm sorry for that."

"What do I do? Nothing's gonna be th' same. I don't think I can face him ever again." He whimpered. Ritsuki sat next to him.

"Sometimes life sucks. You can't do anything about it. If you meant what you said, you shouldn't have any regrets."

"See, why can't I have fallen in love with you?" she let out a laugh.

"We can't help who we fall in love with. It just happens."

"Yeah I guess so." _But why does it have to be with Sanzo? Why him? There's plenty of nice girls. Perhaps I should run away with Ritsuki. Ha. _Both of them jumped when the door slammed open.

"Sanzo?!" Sanzo turned to Ritsuki.

"Leave. I need to speak with him." Goku shivered at the rage in his voice. Ritsuki got up and left them alone. After the door closed, Sanzo turned to Goku. Goku sank back into the bed. His head whipped up at the sound of a safety being turned off. Sanzo stood in front of him, gun to his nose.

"Wha-what?!" Goku stared into the barrel.

"I can't have you loving me. It's not good for me or you."

"But!" Goku was silenced as a gunshot rang out.

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Ooh baby that was fun to write. So, did Sanzo do it? Well, does he ever miss? Imagine Ritsuki. Hearing the shot. Hmmm. Guess we'll see next chapter!!

Love all of you, please r&r!!!!


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